All husbands are interested in skipping foreplay, right?

There are hundreds of thousands of husbands the world over who make it regular practice to get out of their own way.  One of the biggest traps that husbands can fall into is being too prideful to realize when it’s time to make it about what your wife needs, not about what you want.

A friend of mine and I were talking one day and he told me that he had this great evening planned where he was going to have a guitar lesson and then go race remote control cars.  Sounds like a great evening for guys, right?  I talked to him the next day and he told me that he ended up canceling the whole evening.  When I asked him why, he told me that his wife (who, by the way had her fabulous Nerdy Alphabet artwork featured on Arts Afire) had a bad evening and needed to be picked up.  So he just canceled his plans, just like that, to be with her.

Last night when I got home, my wife was knee deep in the middle of writing her final paper for one of her college classes.  She’s been sick for a week, so it was extra stress, and our apartment was a mess.  Without being asked I decided to clean up.  I threw out the trash & the mounds of used tissue, put away the clean & dirty clothes, organized the papers and books, and swept the floor.  It wasn’t much, but it made a huge difference in our stress level.  Then I left her alone to finish her paperwork.

I updated my Facebook status to say, “Cory is a Tidy Husband.”  One of my friends (a guy) asked what that meant, if that had something to do with Kitty Litter?  One of my other friends (a girl) gave a rather terse reply saying that it meant that I put away my socks and didn’t act like it was doing my wife a favor.

The difference between the way men and women think, right?

Husbands, do yourselves and your marriage a favor, and get out of your own way.  These little acts of service are what marriage is all about.  Oh, yeah, and I’ve heard a lot of women say that it’s the best kind of foreplay.

If you’ve ever thought that you need a quick idea for a way to get family togetherness on Thanksgiving, Twitter is an awesome focus group. I asked my friends on Twitter to shout out their favorite Thanksgiving traditions. Special thanks to chrisbrogan from Dad-O-Matic for broadcasting this Tweet. Check it out.

rockcandytv: Going to NYC to watch the balloons blown up for the Macy’s Day Parade.

BLG: - Our tradition is to put the turkey in the oven and go to the gym for a workout, a swim and a sauna with any willing guest.

jennypratt: Fav T-giving tradition - going around the table & having everyone (of all ages) say what they are thankful for before eating

iberyoung: - we like to think of mashed potatoes as a blank canvas, and the kids get to decide what goes in. They love it!

Feelslikehome: My Thanksgiving menu, w/recipes linked http://tinyurl.com/6bmej3 (expand)

ScottHepburn: The Quasi-annual Hepburn Family Snow-quet Match is a one-of-a-kind…

paysonjewelry our family always goes around the table saying what we are thankful for - this year as we will be apart we will all email and it will be read at our respective tables.

Last week I had a root canal.  Anyone who tells you a root canal doesn’t hurt is a liar.  Let me get that out of the way.  It’s been 3 days and I’m in agony.

My darling wife, however has been unbelievably kind.  She has really gone out of her way to be nice to me and to help me find things to eat that are soft enough to mash with my tongue.  How is it that she can be so kind and considerate, and I am so often a bumbling oaf?

Women give compassion.

Something about being built for childbirth makes women more compassionate.  They talk about their emotions more and they empathize more than men do.  If men cared about other people as much as women do, perhaps there wouldn’t be war.

Women give love.

My wife writes about femininity and love.  She has expressed before that true femininity is strong, powerful, and full of love.  Women are capable of figuring out what people need when they are hurting and then fulfilling that need.  In sports we call these the intangibles.

Women give service.

While I wouldn’t say that my wife’s love language is service, I would say that she has a definite need to take care of me sometimes.  I think we all want to feel needed and appreciated.  My wife loves being able to care for me when I’m really not well.  This weekend was one of those times.  Last night I was feeling guilty about her doing so much for me when she’s so stressed out about college finals and I tried to tell her that I could turn on the computer and watch a movie myself, that she could go take a bath.  It hurt her feelings that I didn’t want her to do things for me.  She really does love me.

I appreciate my wife.  Sometimes I think that know so little of how much she loves me and how she expresses that love.  I am a blessed man.