I don’t think I can say enough good things about complimenting your spouse.  At the end of Companionship.  Inventory each week, my wife and I make sure we tell each other at least 4 - 5 things that we appreciate about each other that week.  We do this without fail, every week, whether we’ve been fighting or not.

In previous posts, we’ve discussed:

• Perform a weekly planning routine.
• Discuss important family business.
• Taking time to share testimony.

It’s a pretty simple concept, but praise and positive reinforcement do a lot for a relationship, especially if one partner is feeling underappreciated.  I should say that no matter what, you must be absolutely sincere.  If you and your wife can’t find anything to compliment each other on, then you need to seek professional help.

Compliment time is my wife’s favorite time of the week.  What is the best compliment that you ever received from your spouse?

Soooo…if you’re dumb as a brick, and you want to work in marketing, where could you end up working?  How about for Motrin?  I’ve got to say, I didn’t think the ad was that bad, but then, hey, I’m not a mom, so what do I know?

Here’s a piece of marriage advice guys: don’t make fun of mothers.  Funny, it also works as advertising advice.  Perhaps I should be an advertising consultant.  I’m willing. Oh, and sorry to those of you who got 9 posts from me on Twitter - I’m experimenting with a new plug in and it barfed all over my blog.

For those of you who don’t know the Monday Morning Amour drill:

1. Decide what romantic thing you’re going to do for your spouse this week. Could be anything. From as simple as giving a foot rub to planning a romantic date, to planning a romantic vacation, the idea is for you to do something.

2. Let us know what you’re going to plan by leaving a comment below. If you want it to be a surprise, then just give a general idea (I’m planning a date), or, if it will help you get rolling, leave as much detail as you want to.

3. Let us know what will motivate you to make sure it happens. Plan a reward for yourself, or plan consequences if you fail, but make sure that it happens! My goal as A Good Husband is to help inspire all the guys out there to go the extra mile, and, even more so, to make sure that I go the extra mile. I want my wife to know that she is incredibly special, and this is a great way for me to do that.

It’s my wife’s birthday this week.  I already bought her presents.  BTW, if you want to see a girl squirm, buy her a present two weeks early and then leave it sitting, wrapped, in the living room until her birthday and tell her that she can’t peek or know what it is.  Good times.

Anyway…this week I’m planning on being so nice to my wife - and by so nice I mean that I have several little things planned that I can’t mention here because it won’t be a surprise otherwise (yes, my wife actually reads these things and holds me accountable).  Let’s just say she’ll get some extra attention this week.

What about you?

• Salespeople who aren’t aggressive are driving me crazy. Close the darn sale guys. C’mon. #
• Catch the awesome @marcwarnke on Blog Talk Radio today - then start a write in campaign to get me invited… #
• interview with wife & I at @simplemarriage http://tinyurl.com/6b3uzf #
• Interview w/ me & wife at Simple Marriage Project http://tinyurl.com/6b3uzf #
• @dcmba well, it all starts with a squash and an internet connection. When Google sets up their E.V.I.L. Search, our client will take the squ in reply to dcmba #
• How to turn on your wife http://tinyurl.com/69a6g4 #
• @utkevdawg it’s not something that I could copyright, it’s just a deal similar to what we do, but outside of our normal parameters. in reply to UTKevDawg #
• because I honestly don’t know. I gave them the opp, but they’re just sitting on it, not doing anything, and I don’t think they’re going to #
• If your company refuses to follow a lucrative biz opp that you unearthed, is it unethical to pursue it yourself? #
• @kurokaze204 ….aaaand that’s the reason I work in sales, not in IT. I don’t see buttons on bottom left of screen telling me what to do. in reply to kurokaze204 #
• Trying to figure out how to unsubscribe from certain podcasts on iTunes. #
• @brudette I’d encourage you to stay strong on the media fast, but then you wouldn’t be using Twitter…. in reply to Brudette #
• @gwalter yup. give Akismet a day or two and they’ll catch ‘em. in reply to gwalter #
• @thedailyblonde Sprint’s got a version of the Google phone (the G1) that was due December, but was pushed back to 2009. in reply to TheDailyBlonde #
• @thedailyblonde Speaking of heat, I was wondering when Sprint is going to release their version of the Android. (I know - not related at all in reply to TheDailyBlonde #
• Are working women less feminine? http://tinyurl.com/59mxgv #
• RT: @Akula DNC is asking me for $30 because Obama won. I should feel OK about it because they would have wanted $150 had he lost. #
• Twitterank doesn’t work for me. Stupid fail whale. #
• @backpackingdad Gotta go with Ratt for the guitar, Skid Row for the sheer mendacity of their song titles. #
• @backpackingdad Who’s better: Warrant, Ratt, or Skid Row? #
• In the process of looking for some really cool handmade/homemade card & certificate artists. #
• Anyone know anyone that has successfully turned their blog into an ecommerce site using a WP shopping cart? I’m stumped. #
• RT: @ihenpecked I just want to hear Obama tell Bush: “Get the @#$$@ out of my White House.” #
• @utkevdawg Mormons have been baptizing on behalf of deceased persons for years. Don’t think that’s a new concern. #
• @xolotl Sexual orientation discrimination is the reason I’ve been in such a tizzy the last few days. How do we reconcile? It’s tough. #
• A friend of mine has been ostracized at work just for being a member of the church - she doesn’t even live in CA, and didn’t vote on #prop8 #
• It’s weird to me how much of the passage of Prop 8 is getting pinned on Mormons. It’s not like we were the only ones involved. #
• Huffington post attacks Mormons for their involvement in Prop 8. Why the Mormons? There were Catholics, Blacks, Hispanics… #
• Hrm…how do you peacefully reconcile Christians and gays? How can they live together in harmony? #Prop8 #
• New Post: Gay Liberal and Conservative Christian Marriage:
  37 states in the USA have some .. http://tinyurl.com/6y7khw #
• @MichaelsDaddy NP. Didn’t take offense. Prop 8 is a big button issue. I spent a long time considering whether to tackle it. #
• @michaelsdaddy Discussion on Prop 8 on my site is much better than elsewhere. Some sites it gets really bad. #
• @skydiver where do we send urgent queries to? #
• Discussion on the continued support of Proposition 8 http://tinyurl.com/5jq2r4 #
• Stupid Linux OS won’t work with Hallmark e-Cards. Lame. #
• @nunoxeo No Godaddy issues here #
• New Post: Proposition 8: A Poll: I support Proposition 8 and traditional definitions of mar.. http://tinyurl.com/6b3xgf #

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How do you turn an American Redneck into an English gentleman?  Apparently you shave the handlebars off of his Mo, comb his hair, and put a bow tie on him.  That’e me, there to the left, and this is me last week, showing my redneck roots.

Movember has been a fun thing for me to participate in.  While other men have probably raised far more money than me, I’ve raised a little bit, and it’s been really good to see.

There are all sorts of health problems out there besides Prostate Cancer.  I’ve had allergic asthma for about 14 years.  This type of asthma is more common among young boys than it is among girls for some reason, but I keep it under control by taking a daily inhaled steroid, and by exercising.

Now, I don’t know how much the average man exercises, but if it’s like me before I got motivated to take care of my asthma, it’s probably about once every 10th or 20th time he feels guilty about his physical shape.  Sound about right?

Turns out that while most men benefit from exercise, it’s actually vitally important for me to exercise, or my lungs stop working properly.  No oxygen = very cranky Good Husband.

What kind of exercising do I do you ask?  Well, for those new readers who don’t know, I have been engaged in the wonderful activity of commuting by bike to work.  I ride about 10 miles each way, morning and night.  I really enjoy the ride, it gives me time to think, listen to Olberman’s podcast, or just rock out to some great tunage.

Speaking of podcasts, I was thinking of starting a podcast.  Would you listen?

Remember, you only have two more weeks to donate to Men’s Health Research.

The cute wife and I did an interview about marriage with Corey Allen, marriage advice superstar over at the Simple Marriage Project.  If you don’t read Corey’s blog, then you’re missing out on advice on marriage from a guy who actually studied this stuff in college!  He might even know what the heck he’s talking about, not like me…

It was a lot of fun to do the interview.  Thanks Corey!

“The pendulum on equal rights has swung so far the other direction that men are being painted with a cruel brush, coloring them as inherently crass, vulgar, uncaring, and violent taskmasters. They aren’t. Equality as sameness has never been, will never be, the issue. What we want is consideration, companionship, and balance.”
~ my wife

Obviously I love, respect and admire my wife a great deal.  When we were first married I started noticing a lot of guys that I knew making jokes about how their wives were better people than they were.  More spiritual, better dressed, more kind, and better parents.  Somehow many men are buying into the extreme feminist notion that men are inherently less appealing than women.  I started to go along with it.  I’d make jokes about her being better than me to other guys and they’d laugh knowingly.  Women would laugh and agree.

It bothered my wife, though.  After hearing me a few times she asked me to stop.  When I asked her why, she told me to look at it from the point of view of how me being so much less makes her judgement look.  If I’m really worth so little, and she’s worth so much, then why would she have chosen to marry me in the first place.  Either I duped her, or she settled.  Obviously neither choice is satisfactory.

I had to stop telling people that she was so much better than me, and honestly, it’s been good for our relationship.

The Bible talks about being equally yoked together.  Most likely you and your spouse chose each other because you had common skills, interests, and/or backgrounds.  When you were dating you felt equal to being with each other.  Hopefully you will continue to embrace and uplift each other so that you both feel up to facing whatever challenges you face.

37 states in the USA have some sort of ban against same sex marriage.

Opinions on the subject are sharply divided among religious lines. Traditional, conservative, older churches (with the notable exception of many Jews) support an outright ban and preach that that homosexuality is a sin.

Many secularists and liberal religious groups say that bans against gay marriage are bigotry and have no place in contemporary society. They argue that marriage is a fundamental right to every person, regardless of sexual orientation.

Irreconcilable Differences

The problem is that it seems impossible to reconcile these two opposing views, and the discussion is growing heated almost beyond the point of civilized return.

Why does the gay community want the recognition of marriage? Some gay couples are Christians who want their church to change their doctrine to legitimize their marriage. They feel that God loves them and will recognize their committed union regardless of what the Bible teaches. Other groups want access to the legal benefits of marriage.

Should government regulate marriage?

Great difficulty stems from the fact that so much of how couples receive their legal rights is tied up in an institution that began as a religious ceremony.  While it is possible to receive many of the same legal rights as marriage via a Power of Attorney document (health benefits, life insurance, hospital visitation, etc), many gay couples will argue that “separate but equal” is anything but equal.

Conservative Christians, on the other hand, will argue that not only does gay marriage redefine what marriage is, not only does it undermine the foundation of traditional values, but God has said that homosexuality is immoral in and of itself.  Gay marriage can never be justified under the law because you are giving legal rights and legitimacy to an immoral act.  Many other acts of immorality have no laws enacted against them in the USA.  A person can have sex outside of marriage, commit adultery, drink, do drugs and suffer no legal ramifications one way or another.  There are, however, no legal rights associated with these acts.  They do not carry the legal weight of institutional recognition.

What it boils down to.

The crux of the argument: the gay community wants equal rights and the religious community believes that homosexuality is a sin and therefore cannot be legitimized.

How then, can such opposing views be reconciled?

You have an intellectual argument that makes sense butting up against a spiritual or theological mandate that carries not the power of intellect, but the mandate of divine revelation.

Because of children, and for the sake of an organized and fair society, it is the government’s interest to regulate marriage and the rights that are associated with marriage.  The state saves a great deal of money over time if children are raised by their parents in their own homes, and if families are stable.  Because the government in this country is run by the people’s vote, the concerns of all parties must be considered for the health of our democracy.

America on the brink.

America stands on the brink of a moral crisis. Not only is it moral to love and serve your fellow man, but it is also morally imperative to follow your spiritual promptings.

How do conservative Christians come together with the gay community?  Should they come together?  If neither side is willing to compromise, then what happens?  Does the majority enforce their will on the minority?  If this happens, how will their ever be harmony?

I support Proposition 8 and traditional definitions of marriage.  For those of you who don’t know, Proposition 8 is an amendment to the California state constitution that states, “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.”

This amendment was passed by a 52% to 47% margin in the recent election.  The language on the ballot, which is considerably different from the language of the initiative itself, reads, “Eliminates Right of Same-Sex Couples to Marry.”  While it may amount to the same thing, the difference is one of semantics and is at the crux of the protests and angry arguments that supporters and detractors are having.

Even though the amendment passed, gay rights groups are challenging it in court and there’s a good chance this battle will drag on for years to come.  Proposition 8 raises some very challenging questions about the nature of marriage.

There’s a poll on the right side.  Why don’t you answer and let us know what you think by commenting below?

This is me, early this morning.  As FussyPants would say, “Fight the Frump!”

So, here we are on day seven of Movember.  I can grow a pretty killer ’stache in just six days, yes?  Let’s not talk about the hair.

People are starting to ask me about the facial hair, so that means it’s doing it’s job.

Did you know that the average man’s life span goes up SEVEN YEARS when he gets married?  Part of that is attributed to the fact that most guys can’t cook, so single men just give up after a while…but in all seriousness, married men live longer because they are less likely to engage in risky behavior, and more likely to GO TO THE FRICKIN’ DOCTOR and get checked for things like Prostate Cancer.

Cancer is the number two killer (behind heart disease) of men in the USA.  Prostate cancer is the number two cancer for men (behind lung cancer).  If you’re over 40, go get screened.  If you’re under 40, stop eating Krispy Kreme hamburgers.  They’re bad for you, and that’s just disgusting!

Please donate to Prostate Cancer research.

I’ve been completely distracted by the presidential election.  So have all of you, don’t try to deny it.

In case you haven’t been distracted (or you are sick of election news) and are in need of some really interesting material to read, I suggest some of these very interesting posts over the past couple of weeks:

• I’ve been following Darren Rowse from Problogger for some time now.  He started a new blog this week called Twitip - Twitter Tips for Beginners.  If you don’t know what Twitter is, or you do and you don’t understand how very useful it is, then take a look at Twitip, especially the post on why we love Twitter.
• If you don’t know about Movember, or if you do and you were wondering if there really were that many guys participating in such a silly fundraiser, then take a look at Derek, Tyler, and DChristian’s pages announcing their participation in the drive.  Give some money to Prostate Cancer research!
• If you’re newly married, you perhaps haven’t had the opportunity to cook your own Thanksgiving dinner.  Perhaps you’re even a little concerned about it.  If you want to know what equipment you might need for that first Thanksgiving dinner, you might try Caroline’s post on What You Might Need for Thanksgiving Dinner.
• For one of those short, tug the heart strings kind of posts, you should check out my new favorite Dad Blogger - Mike Henneke.  His post about missed opportunities with his son hits home - hard.

Off to do more celebrating.  I got about as much work done today as I did blogging.  Have fun & celebrate a lot!