Mormon Swearing
Thanks to CafePress
This has little to nothing to do with being A Good Husband, but I was talking with a few people yesterday on Twitter and they mentioned my editing of Jenny the Bloggess’ swearing on her answers to my questions about what makes A Good Husband. Jenny even felt a little bad about being edited.
Jenny, allow me to explain.
If you’ve ever spent any time in Utah, there is a very amusing culture of swearing without swearing. What do I mean? I think many of you know - you stub your down, and say “Fetch,” instead of … well, any other word that begins with F.
Mormons are experts at this kind of language manipulation. We don’t swear, so we have to find some other inventive way of expressing intense emotional anxiety.
I started digging into my memory of growing up as a teenager in a Utah high school and remembering what my peers used to say.
Got Down Sat On A Bench. Son of A Bishop. Oh My Heck. Aw Heck.
Okay, so those are the ones that I used to be guilty of saying. Oh, then there’s the one that I still use all the time:
I started asking my friends on Twitter which Mormon swears they remember, they came up with some good ones (no, they’re not all Mormon - you Gossip-Mo’s just stay away):
@LeislB 
jimminy christmas, holy shinola, frizz, sunny beaches, fudge … my favorite “Oh, my biggest freakin’ heck!”
@deguia The best “swearing” is from kids entertainment. Thomas the Train: “Cinders and Ashes!” SpongeBob: “Barnacles!”
@granata Hacking, Son of a Biscuit Eater, Son of a Mother, Holy Shinto, shiggles (s**ts and giggles). Reminds me of A Christmas Story.
@circa1978 My wife uses “Oh flip flap”. Some more of my favs: “What the frick”, “frackin’”, “What the doodle”, “oh, stink”, “oh suck” …
@BackpackingDad “Moroni’s Trumpet!” I just made that one up :} (worth honorable mention, just for the “what the…” factor)
So, you see, Ms. Bloggess, when you grow up in this kind of culture, you kinda can’t help ya’self. I’m not apologizing for the censoring per se, merely justifying. I hope you won’t be too upset.
Now back to your regularly scheduled constructive marriage advice blogging. Oh, if I missed any (which I know I did) you might as well comment so that the collection is complete.
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Steal from Battlestar Galactica. More people should use “Felgercarb!”
Scotts last blog post..More Christian Rip-offery
oh, the list goes on and on.. don’t even know where to begin!
‘oh sugar’ (a favorite of a jr high minister i knew)
‘poop’
’shizzlesticks’
‘dangley doodles’
‘dag nabbit’
from high school, ‘nucking futs’
i <3 creative profanity..
ChurchPunkMoms last blog post..so they say it’s your birthday…
@churchpunkmom that last one was one of my best friend’s favorites. I totally forgot about that one. Great.
I love this post. I too grew up in Utah and although not LDS still picked up the “mormon swearing”. It’s tough not to do like Utah and BYU coed jokes. 
Shane Keeners last blog post..Camping in Big Bear
Hey, I’m Catholic and I had to use substitue words, too.
As a kid I loved ABBOT & COSTELLO’s movies and TV shows, so much so I used mimick Lou Costello’s Biffle-Diffle …. now you made me say a baaaaddd woird!
Charlie on PA Tpks last blog post..VP Debate: watch for the bias from the allegedly neutral moderator
I’m a “frickity frick” girl myself.
Untypically Jias last blog post..Blogging Mormons: Part 1
I heard . . .
“oh mylanta”
“schnizzlefritz”
of course personally I say . . .
“oh! bad words, bad words, bad words”
lisss last blog post..Fascinating Womanhood and Female Friendship
Ah!!! and of course “Vai pra ponte que te partiu!!!”
(Go the the brisge that broke on you… I know… it doesn’t make much sense in english!)
hehehehe
UrbanVoxs last blog post..Stay At Home Dad…
My mom always used to say, “don’t be such an as…tronaut, with a big emphasis on the first syllable. Hope you don’t have to edit this one.
I heard this one on a commercial for Gossip Girl:
Mother Trucker!
I liked it so much I have incorporated it into my own non-curse cuss words.
Ginas last blog post..A Sunday Survey
Ah, yes. The hilarious Mother Trucker. I forgot about that one. Haven’t heard it since…oh, I don’t know…Junior high, maybe?
lol. Welcome Gina!
I have youngsters and I’m a recent convert to the church so I have had to get a bit creative also.
“Oh my wow”
“Insert swear word here”
“oh, bad word”
fricker frackin flickle flackin”
I do have to say I am guilty of using British swear words cause most people don’t know the meanings…
I know that this post is a bit old, but I just had to contribute my two favorites. Anyone who knows me knows that I don’t swear. I mean never. (Ok, there was that one time that I decided to go for a big reaction and said the “C” word out of the blue while my friend was driving…. He almost drove off the road. Now *THAT’S* a reaction!)
I picked up saying “Frell” from Farscape instead of some other “F” words. As a bonus, it can be added onto like the other F word. For example, “The frelling computer crashed!” “Bob frelled up the monthly reports again.”
Then there’s the Madagascar route: Sugar Honey Iced Tea. Took me a viewing or two to catch that one.
TechyDads last blog post..Horrendous Hair Cutting Controversy
I like saying “BAD WORDS!” myself. My daughter has adopted the use of “Fluffy Bunnies!”
I borrowed “flapdoodle” from a Stephen King story, that’s a good one too.
toms last blog post..Crisis!
It seems to me if a word reminds you of the word you are not saying then it would remind everyone else of that word too.
My kids and grandkids know that the F word substitutes are a real pet peeve of mine so when they say it around me they always end with, sorry grandma. I guess I’m just old fashioned.
Grandma Henkes last blog post..To Grandmother’s House We Go
My 7yr old daughter has favorite “curse” words too. She informed me (very loudly) the other night that she couldn’t finish her homework because she was “freakin’ tired!” I couldn’t help but laugh…
Great post!
kspins last blog post..Camera Shy