Comments on: Supporting Your Wife After Rape or Sexual Abuse http://agoodhusband.net/2008/04/supporting-your-wife-after-rape-or-sexual-abuse/ Marriage Advice From A Man Wed, 08 Sep 2010 05:24:20 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 By: Helpless http://agoodhusband.net/2008/04/supporting-your-wife-after-rape-or-sexual-abuse/#comment-1613 Helpless Thu, 26 Aug 2010 10:20:38 +0000 http://agoodhusband.net/?p=253#comment-1613 Were can i find a some help for me? My girlfreind was raped in her school and she has gotten over it but i keep having this reccuring nightmare of it and wishing i could stop it. Does anyone have an advice as to help me with this? Were can i find a some help for me? My girlfreind was raped in her school and she has gotten over it but i keep having this reccuring nightmare of it and wishing i could stop it. Does anyone have an advice as to help me with this?

]]> By: John http://agoodhusband.net/2008/04/supporting-your-wife-after-rape-or-sexual-abuse/#comment-1612 John Sun, 15 Aug 2010 16:50:46 +0000 http://agoodhusband.net/?p=253#comment-1612 My wife was raped 8 years ago. The person was a co-worker and supposed friend of hers. I can proudly say that I have already done pretty much everything in your article. She did not tell me this occurred at first but I later became aware of it. I have been aware for most of those 8 years now and still struggle with it. The hardest thing to cope with is that we have no intimacy at all in our marriage (and no I'm not just talking about sex). Is it normal for it to take this many years to heal ANY? We have gone to counseling and I believe that I have been extremely supportive. I would welcome any "healing" stories or advice. My wife was raped 8 years ago. The person was a co-worker and supposed friend of hers. I can proudly say that I have already done pretty much everything in your article. She did not tell me this occurred at first but I later became aware of it. I have been aware for most of those 8 years now and still struggle with it. The hardest thing to cope with is that we have no intimacy at all in our marriage (and no I’m not just talking about sex). Is it normal for it to take this many years to heal ANY? We have gone to counseling and I believe that I have been extremely supportive. I would welcome any “healing” stories or advice.

]]> By: John http://agoodhusband.net/2008/04/supporting-your-wife-after-rape-or-sexual-abuse/#comment-1611 John Sun, 15 Aug 2010 07:16:01 +0000 http://agoodhusband.net/?p=253#comment-1611 My wife was raped 8 years ago. She did not tell me at the time but I have known for many years now. It was a co-worker and supposed friend of hers. I'm proud to say that I have done pretty much exactly everything recommended in your post. But, how much patience is expected on my part? We still have NO intimacy in our marriage (not just sex... but any intimacy). We've been to counseling, too. Are there cases where the victim never really heals to any degree? Or, is this amount of time realistic? When does it become a realization on my part that things are never going to change? My optimism is fading. I would very much welcome ANY advice or sources of information that would help us further. My wife was raped 8 years ago. She did not tell me at the time but I have known for many years now. It was a co-worker and supposed friend of hers. I’m proud to say that I have done pretty much exactly everything recommended in your post. But, how much patience is expected on my part? We still have NO intimacy in our marriage (not just sex… but any intimacy). We’ve been to counseling, too. Are there cases where the victim never really heals to any degree? Or, is this amount of time realistic? When does it become a realization on my part that things are never going to change? My optimism is fading. I would very much welcome ANY advice or sources of information that would help us further.

]]> By: johndoe http://agoodhusband.net/2008/04/supporting-your-wife-after-rape-or-sexual-abuse/#comment-1277 johndoe Fri, 01 May 2009 14:35:59 +0000 http://agoodhusband.net/?p=253#comment-1277 where can I find a book about this so I can better help my wife where can I find a book about this so I can better help my wife

]]> By: Christopher Diggins http://agoodhusband.net/2008/04/supporting-your-wife-after-rape-or-sexual-abuse/#comment-38 Christopher Diggins Sun, 21 Sep 2008 01:46:47 +0000 http://agoodhusband.net/?p=253#comment-38 This is a very complicated issue since "just being patient" is not easy to do especially over an extended period of time. Many incest survivors or sex abuse survivors are not pleasant to be around. They can be moody, bitter, resentful, even hostile. Of course, we can all display these qualities at times. So, the question is how can the couple best deal with a difficult situation as this? Both need counseling as soon as possible even if they are resistive to going- they have to if they want to save the marriage and heal from past wounds. This is a very complicated issue since “just being patient” is not easy to do especially over an extended period of time. Many incest survivors or sex abuse survivors are not pleasant to be around. They can be moody, bitter, resentful, even hostile. Of course, we can all display these qualities at times. So, the question is how can the couple best deal with a difficult situation as this?

Both need counseling as soon as possible even if they are resistive to going- they have to if they want to save the marriage and heal from past wounds.

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